Somewhere to sit

I had a great moment of clarity in the haze of this week.

It was about how wonderful my little family is and how, despite the ups and downs, I really love life.

Don't get me wrong, we aren't perfect. Things aren't perfect. But we are lucky. The job situation for D might be about to change. Stuff I've wanted to happen has started to happen. E's first week settling into her new room at nursery has been better than perfect. She is so much fun, she never stops amazing us and we are so proud of her. My husband is amazing, and I am truly blessed. I have ordered new sofas.

And if I have my husband and my daughter and somewhere to sit, what else do I really have to worry about?

Silent Sunday

A Rush of Love

Thrilled that I am being hosted by Harriet over at A Rush of Love today as her guest blogger.

Why not pop over and have a read?

Thanks for having me, Harriet!

What I took for granted

I have felt poorly for well over a month. A niggling sore throat and some pain in my ear, reminiscent of the joyful infection I got for Christmas. Run down. Grotty. Naturally with a long weekend off work, it got worse.

The out of hours doctor was as useful as a chocolate fire guard; viral infection, get some rest. Super. A teacher in exam season has no time to rest. A mother never has time to rest. I had no time to rest. Needless to say, when I woke on Tuesday morning ready for work, I felt like death. Like the heroine that I am (chortle) I soldiered into work, that coursework won't send itself. That sapped all I had, I came home in bright sunshine shivering, went to bed early and woke in a sweat at 11pm. More painkillers got me through to Wednesday morning but nothing had shifted. Reluctantly, having noticed that there were no exam classes on my timetable, I called in sick.

I cannot abide taking days off. Setting work from home is a nightmare and finding activities that are worthwhile and beneficial is hard when you're feeling fuzzy headed. My classroom is always a tip when I return. I can't bring myself to switch off my emails and inevitably still do some work. I feel massively guilty. Massively. Made worse, as I've had time off already for me, and for a poorly E this year. 

I got up, set work, waved E off to nursery and then slept on the sofa all morning. I ate crumpets and slept some more. D collected E so I could stay in my pjs. I got an early night. I felt a bit queasy from the painkillers and limited food intake, but I felt clearer as I went up to bed.

Yesterday morning I woke up feeling like a new woman. For the first time in weeks, my eyelids didn't feel like they had been closed with heavy duty magnets. Getting out of bed was easy. My throat was still sore but paracetamol alone solved it. I was able to enjoy half an hour with E and read with her before leaving. I was still awake at 11pm last night!

Before I had children, I don't think I'd ever have given a rest day this much credit. I don't think I'd have felt that a day of recharging could be enough. I took lazy days and weekends for granted, I was spoiled. Wednesday was a luxury, really, in a way. I realise that my stay at home pals will grumble that they never get these days, I guess that this, for me, is the silver lining of being a working mum. I can have a silent sick day, at home alone. For a fee. It felt weird, being home alone. But I was struggling with this poorliness. Now I am back all over it.

So today, I am mostly taking nothing for granted. It's my favourite day of the week, which means it's nearly time for my favourite lunch date. And this week I can enjoy her without quietly wishing I could climb into her cot with her for a nap. I will relish every second.

How lucky am I? I don't think I need to answer that.

Bank Holiday Weekend Round up

Such a fun weekend of visiting, exploring, playing and relaxing in the sunshine. Perfect! 

Helping mummy hang out the washing

Ducks

Exploring local history

Beautiful blue skies

The hat which stayed on the about 3 seconds.

Wet play

Messy play

Silent Sunday

Splish splash

I've "been for a swim" quite a few times since E was born.

By that, I mean that I've sat in the shallow end of the kids pool next to the lifesize plastic alligator/crocodile while E runs around splashing.

I've not actually done any swimming.

Come to think of it, I've not really participated in formal exercise since I found out I was expecting. In 2011. I've walked a hell of a long way - we are massive lovers of the countryside and walking, with a boarder collie to match - but I've not been to a class or the like since Mrs Zumba banned me from going to her class upon mentioning the "p" word.

Last week, I was writing about how to address my work life balance, how to find more time, make more time, bury some work or whatever I needed to do to make me feel like I was a little more on top of things. Well, this is step one, I have decided. It's going to happen every week from now on.

It was impromptu. I was unpacking the shopping and the delivery driver had commented on what a nice evening it was. She was right. Perfect for a walk up to the pool and perfect for some me time. And me time it was. 1 hour and 20 minutes with my own thoughts... Not thinking about work, planning, marking, coursework. Not worrying about E, who is safely tucked up in bed, dosed up on painkillers for these molars, carefree and warm. Not looking at the washing, the hoover, the pile of stuff on the stairs that doesn't have a home and could really do with having one. Bliss.

But my GOODNESS am I sore. My caesarian scar and lower abdominal muscles feel battered. My arms feel a bit wobbly. I had to give up after 25 minutes and then hop around in the shallow end as I got awful cramp in my calf. And then I tried again, and the cramp came back, so that put an end to that one... But it felt good to be exercising, it felt good to be doing something different and it felt liberating to be out on a school night.

For my next trick, how to make coursework mark itself...