When you read this, please don't think that the way I am feeling today is all that different to the way that I normally feel about you. It isn't. But the last few days just seem to have been particularly incredible, and no matter how much praise I give you now, I don't think you'll understand exactly how wonderful I think you are.
I guess the things you have done this week seem particularly significant because yesterday was a massive reminder of where we started and how far we have come in the last fourteen months. A blink of an eye ago, you were a scrunched up little bundle who knew nothing else but to cry and make involuntary movements. You have learned everything you know in such a short amount of time and I wish that I could be as determined and as quick to learn as you.
Yesterday, we went to meet Baby Dorothy, and your lovely, caring nature brought a tear to my eye. I understand that you needed to share my lap with her, that's fine. But as soon as you saw past the little bit of jealousy that you had, you could see what I could see too. A tiny, darling little life that deserved your affection as much as she deserved mine. You reached out and put your hands around her head and gently pulled her towards you, before kissing her, resting your head on hers and saying "aaaaaaaaah." My heart melted away and I couldn't hold back the little tear. When did you learn to be lovely? Who taught you that's what you do to tiny people? Goodness, I love you.
Today, I can see you starting to compute information in a more sophisticated way. You know that Hairy Maclary is about dogs, and that we can watch it on the iPad. You can say dog. So you pass me the iPad and insist "dogs". You know what you want and you're starting to find the way to express it. And to think that just weeks ago, I sometimes couldn't understand you at all.
And those movements which you've learned bit by bit, that gradually brought you upright, to your knees, to your feet, with no support, can now do things first time. It's not so much about trial and error any more. You watched us on your scooter and then you just did it. Almost without thinking. Tonight you pointed at the washing hanging in the bathroom and you could tell me that those flappy things we "sssssks". I know you mean socks. How did you get to be so clever?
Just when I think I couldn't love your company more, I find I really do love it even more. We're not just people in the same room anymore; we hang out, we laugh together, we understand and we enjoy it. It makes me excited for tomorrow.
It's important I write this down. There will be times ahead when we struggle, I am quite sure of it. There will be times when you tell me you hate me and there will be times when I do struggle to understand your choices and dislike what you have done. There will be times when I feel disappointed and there will be times when you feel that I've not got it right. We wouldn't be the team we are if we always agreed.
You are amazing. I never knew that parenthood could be this good. Thank you for showing me what it's all about.
I love you.
Showing posts with label sentimental. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sentimental. Show all posts
Saturday, 18 May 2013
Friday, 17 May 2013
Somewhere to sit
I had a great moment of clarity in the haze of this week.
It was about how wonderful my little family is and how, despite the ups and downs, I really love life.
Don't get me wrong, we aren't perfect. Things aren't perfect. But we are lucky. The job situation for D might be about to change. Stuff I've wanted to happen has started to happen. E's first week settling into her new room at nursery has been better than perfect. She is so much fun, she never stops amazing us and we are so proud of her. My husband is amazing, and I am truly blessed. I have ordered new sofas.
And if I have my husband and my daughter and somewhere to sit, what else do I really have to worry about?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
